Deaths...

Today we were informed that Malini’s dad passed away in India yesterday, Mela called to pass the news. Heard that Malini and her brother left immediately for India to see witness the rites. I should have called her to console her or at least to say something.

But I din...its not that I am not concerned abt it or anything. Of coz I am, after all we were close once when we were alot younger when I used to stay in Changi village and she was one of the kids who used to hang ard in our neighbour hood gang of kids. But I was too scared to call her...

wat if wat happened 9 yrs ago to my best frens dad happens again? Was it something I said? Maybe I said all the wrong things!

Everyone said that I was being silly and that her sis had her own problems and that it had nothing to do with me or wat I said bt I was young and confused and somehow felt that I played a part in it...it took me a couple of yrs to stop blamin myself.

But until now I dun realli have the guts to talk to anyone who is a relation of a recent deceased one abt the death. I dun even know wat to say! My mum says that I am being chidlish and that was a one off incident. She says that I shld grow out of it...But its so easy to articulate...hmmz I will try to talk to Malini abt it when she comes back. I hope I will. This is not the first time I have done this.

I can’t run away frm it all the time.