I hate what you do to me

I hate what you do to me

I hate saying no to you yet secretly hope that you will appear somewhere somehow

I hate having to see someone’s name on my inbox when I hear the sms tone of my handphone

I hate not being able to tell you how much I miss you

I hate not being able to run up to you and give u a big hug when I catch you waiting under my block

I hate saying bye to you at the end of phone conversations and waiting anxiously for your next one

I hate not being able to tell you any of these

For I fear,

I fear one day you will not be near me

I fear your folks will find out one day and they’ll be unhappy and you’ll be unhappy

I fear my folks will say no coz you are younger and coz u smoke

I fear the disappointed tears in my mum’s eyes when she sees the pictures the PI will take

I fear hurting another friend that I don’t even dare put this blog entry up.

I hate what you do to me