can't

i dono why i do this to myself.
i took my phone and read my old messages he sent to me
calling me baby and sweetheartand gorgeous...and askin if i had dinner and lunch ...or if i was home. and that he misses me
and i broke into tears again.
please i cannot take it.
if i can only have one wish i will wish to reverse time.
kill me . i cant do this.