Terrible.
I.was.feeling.really.down.
i.dono…this.is.my.worst.holiday.
for.some.reason.my.hurt.seem.to.have.deepened.over.the.week
i.really.really.need.to.find.a.way.to.live.
i.don’t.want.to.talk.to.my.frens.anymore…they.keep.saying.hes.a.jerk…and.that.hes.prolly.hanging.out.with.a.gal…now.they.say….why.are.you.crying.over.him.….i.get.defensive.and.tell.them.to.stop.calling.him.a.jerk…and.stop.saying.things…..i.mean..yeah..maybe.i.feel.like.wat.he.did.to.me.was.jerkish…bt.nobody.else.has.any.right.to.call.him.that….
so.i.see.R.online…i.thought.i.could.talk.to.R
but…R.right.at.the.beginning.of.the.conversation.started.saying….keep in mind that i am his fren….i.was.puzzled..and.i.asked.him…how.does.you.being.his.fren.matter….and.he.said
coz.he.will.be.biased.and.he.said.he.din.understand..how.i.cld.gruduate.without.understanding.all.these…okayyyyy….
for.a.moment..i.was.taken.back…i.tot..i.was.his.fren.too..i.mean.maybe.not.a.close.onbt.still.a.fren…and.the.he.goes.on.to.say…just want to set the parameters.and.some.of.the.things.i.say.will.be.skewed..and.i.dont.wan’t.things.to.get.too.confused…and.then.he.says.everyone.gets.upset.about.someone.sometime…hmm..now..i.really.dono.wat.he.was.talking.about…maybe.He.told.R.something…about.me..thats.why.R.is.speaking.like.this….damn…i.din.feel.like.speaking.to.him.anymore…i.wasnt.going.to.bitch.about.him.to.R…i.juz.wanted.to.talk.about.my.upsettness.anyways…R.says.he.had.to.go.for.dinner…i.was.glad.to.let.him.go….i.wonder.what.he.told.R…now.ii.dont.feel.like.talking.to.R….maybe.it.was.my.studity.in.wanting.to.talk.to.his.fren….i.wonder.why.he.can’t.tell.me.the.problems…bt.he.tells.it.a.fren.instead…i.wonder.wat.is.so.hard.about.communicating.to.me….maybe.if.i.knew.wat.was.wrong....this.wldnt.have.happened.in.the.first.place..maybei.will.be.less.hurt……coz..the.fact.that.he.is.hurt.coz.of.me…hurts.me.so.much.than.my.own.hurt…maybe.i.did.too.many.things.to.hurt.him…i.wish.i.cld.rewind.the.clock….coz.i.am.really.sorry…and.i.have.grown.up….damn..screw.it.man.i.am.not.even.gona.try.to.talk.to.anyone.anymore..the.best.person…whom.i.can.talk.to.is.him….bt…its.such.a.pity…that.its.him..that..the.whole.thing.was.about....and.i.am.not.allowed.to.talk.to.him
now.i.feel.horrible.abt.wat.R.said.i.dont.think.things.are.going.to.be.the.same.between.R.and.me…….and.tired.of.looking.for.people.to.talk.to….i.need.a.counselor…..why.is.life.so.damn.painful
i.dono…this.is.my.worst.holiday.
for.some.reason.my.hurt.seem.to.have.deepened.over.the.week
i.really.really.need.to.find.a.way.to.live.
i.don’t.want.to.talk.to.my.frens.anymore…they.keep.saying.hes.a.jerk…and.that.hes.prolly.hanging.out.with.a.gal…now.they.say….why.are.you.crying.over.him.….i.get.defensive.and.tell.them.to.stop.calling.him.a.jerk…and.stop.saying.things…..i.mean..yeah..maybe.i.feel.like.wat.he.did.to.me.was.jerkish…bt.nobody.else.has.any.right.to.call.him.that….
so.i.see.R.online…i.thought.i.could.talk.to.R
but…R.right.at.the.beginning.of.the.conversation.started.saying….keep in mind that i am his fren….i.was.puzzled..and.i.asked.him…how.does.you.being.his.fren.matter….and.he.said
coz.he.will.be.biased.and.he.said.he.din.understand..how.i.cld.gruduate.without.understanding.all.these…okayyyyy….
for.a.moment..i.was.taken.back…i.tot..i.was.his.fren.too..i.mean.maybe.not.a.close.onbt.still.a.fren…and.the.he.goes.on.to.say…just want to set the parameters.and.some.of.the.things.i.say.will.be.skewed..and.i.dont.wan’t.things.to.get.too.confused…and.then.he.says.everyone.gets.upset.about.someone.sometime…hmm..now..i.really.dono.wat.he.was.talking.about…maybe.He.told.R.something…about.me..thats.why.R.is.speaking.like.this….damn…i.din.feel.like.speaking.to.him.anymore…i.wasnt.going.to.bitch.about.him.to.R…i.juz.wanted.to.talk.about.my.upsettness.anyways…R.says.he.had.to.go.for.dinner…i.was.glad.to.let.him.go….i.wonder.what.he.told.R…now.ii.dont.feel.like.talking.to.R….maybe.it.was.my.studity.in.wanting.to.talk.to.his.fren….i.wonder.why.he.can’t.tell.me.the.problems…bt.he.tells.it.a.fren.instead…i.wonder.wat.is.so.hard.about.communicating.to.me….maybe.if.i.knew.wat.was.wrong....this.wldnt.have.happened.in.the.first.place..maybei.will.be.less.hurt……coz..the.fact.that.he.is.hurt.coz.of.me…hurts.me.so.much.than.my.own.hurt…maybe.i.did.too.many.things.to.hurt.him…i.wish.i.cld.rewind.the.clock….coz.i.am.really.sorry…and.i.have.grown.up….damn..screw.it.man.i.am.not.even.gona.try.to.talk.to.anyone.anymore..the.best.person…whom.i.can.talk.to.is.him….bt…its.such.a.pity…that.its.him..that..the.whole.thing.was.about....and.i.am.not.allowed.to.talk.to.him
now.i.feel.horrible.abt.wat.R.said.i.dont.think.things.are.going.to.be.the.same.between.R.and.me…….and.tired.of.looking.for.people.to.talk.to….i.need.a.counselor…..why.is.life.so.damn.painful
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